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Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Just a lot of pain & anger


Let me explain something to you. If someone hurts someone I love, albeit , mentally or physically, they may forgive them. I, however, will NOT forgive them nor forget, EVER. I will smile at them, say hello, maybe even give them a hug if need be, but inside, I loathe them with every core of my being and I am only being polite for you because of my love for you. My mom calls it my "Irish side". Whatever it is, it is what it is. I guess it's not particularly "Christian" of me but I don't really care. I understand at the end, it's God's job to ultimately judge what people do, whatever. You hurt someone I love, fuck you til you die. This is who I am and that's never going to change.

I am in tremendous physical pain right now, not going to go into great detail on where or why, but I see a doctor in the morning. I took a vicotin and I have not taken one of those since the babies were born, that is how much pain I am in. Normally I take ibuprofen but I'm out and don't want to take naproxen.

Charlotte is awake. She's been up since 5:30AM. She passed out for a brief 40 minute nap, woke up the second I got out of the shower, her new favorite thing to do, oh and not nap at all after 2PM. Naturally now I'm wearing pajamas again. Both babies are teething pretty badly. So we have fussy ass babies, a momma in tremendous pain and no one here to help me. You wonder why I cry so much? Well, there you have it.

Off to do what I do best, laundry.

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